Yesterday, The New York Times posted Questions To Ask Before You Marry, which I then re-shared in Facebook, setting off an interesting debate. Several of my happily married friends laughed, saying it’s overly pedantic. Me, I like to be thorough about any type of investment or venture I pursue, especially when there’s a contract involved.
What do you think? Does it scream “Written by an MBA” or should couples approach marriage more like a business investment/venture?
Here are the 10 questions:
1. What is our “mission statement” as a couple?
2. To what extent are you willing to go to have a family, medically?
3. What will we do if we find out our child has severe disabilities?
4. Who should I have on speed dial for the days when I just can’t figure you out?
5. Can you name two couples that you admire and would hope to emulate?
6. How do we stay sexually engaged with each other?
7. Will we share our credit reports with each other?
8. Should we have an exit strategy for the marriage, and if so, what would it be?
9. If married previously, why did it end and what did you learn from that relationship?
10. What are our conflict management styles, and are they compatible?
And in response to the “absurdity” of these questions, my friend, John Bordeaux, wrote this response, “Breaking Down Loves Checklist” – which is worth reading and reflection.